HOW TO BECOME A STAND-UP COMEDIAN

When I first started doing stand-up comedy, I had just gotten out of my first marriage, so I had a lot of material to work with…and people could relate (they could also heckle, stalk, and throw up on you). I wish I could say it was easy becoming a stand-up comedian, but I can’t…I also can’t say “Red Leather, Yellow Leather” or “The Sixth Sheik’s Sixth Sheep’s Sick” fast 5 times either.

There are some things that I would like to cover in this article about becoming a stand-up comedian (comedienne, for you ladies out there):

1. Easily overcoming the fear of being in front of people
2. How easy it is to break into the industry
3. All the money you’ll be making
4. The closeness that you’ll develop with your spouse/partner/significant other/etc.
5. Where to steal jokes…I mean, how to write your own material

To start…it’s been said about the comedy industry, ”you have to die on stage at least a hundred times before you’re even considered and amateur.” So now I have to ask you, “are you ready for that kind of life and that kind of rejection?” If not, read no further.

It’s especially difficult when you’re on stage and the crowd is not YOUR crowd. I’ve done gigs where I opened for top comedians and afterward the people in the audience came up to me and told me that I was so much better than the headliner. Of course, I’ve been the headliner who had a brilliant comedian go on before me and there was nothing I could do to win them over to my comedy…it’s a killer. On the other hand, if people are there to see nothing but the headliner…good luck…I hope you like being abused…because it IS going to happen to you!!!

I had a comedian friend who opened for Judy Tenuta. The audience was so rowdy, so ready for Judy, that all through my friend’s set, the audience jeered and started chanting “Judy, Judy, Judy!!” They never really saw his act…they didn’t give him a chance. This was so devastating to my friend that he never did stand-up again…which is a real pity to the world of comedy because he was good. I mean; he was REALLY good!! That audience ended a career. Are you ready for that? If not, read no further.

Now, how to go about getting to the place where you can be abused is just as fun.

Mostly you should read your coffeehouse newspapers or surf the net for places in your area where they have comedy open mike nights. I suggest that you go the first time just to watch, get a feel for the place, go home, write some stuff that appeals to that audience (you’ve got to play to the niche), go back the next time they have open mike night, sign up, go up on stage, and bomb!! The thing is, you’ll probably have a couple of jokes that will work. Save those and throw the others out. Write new ones and go back the next time and keep building up your routine. Eventually, you’ll have some strong material that you could use anywhere you perform. But remember that you’ll be playing to different audiences and different audience “types” when you start going out into the real world, so make sure you have a LOT of strong material.

One time I did a gig with 3 other comedians. When we got to the gig, we were told to do only T.V. clean material (which basically means PG on the rating scale). The other three comedians didn’t have that many clean jokes, so it fell on me to carry the show. We did a great hour-long show…and I was about 40 minutes of it.

If and when you get paid, it isn’t going to be a lot. Back in the 1980’s, there was a comedy trend…or we could even call it a fad. That’s when stand-up comedy was in it’s heyday!! But it didn’t even make it to the end of the decade. Though stand-up comedy is still out there, it isn’t as stylish as it once was…

They used to have television shows on the major networks of stand-up comedians doing 10-20 minutes of T.V. clean sets…different comedians every week. Some of those comedians went on to bigger and better careers (Jerry Seinfeld, Tim Allen, Robin Williams, Whoopi Goldberg, etc.) and others went all the way of the world (comedians you haven’t heard of before). Those that have made it are making a SHIPLOAD of money…the rest are getting $50-$100 bucks a set at the comedy clubs around the country and having to travel from dive to dive. Now, I will tell you that they are making more money than that at the better comedy clubs (Evening at the Improv, The Comedy Store, etc.), but it isn’t as easy to get booked into those places. You have to keep treading, trudging, and touring. Can you do that? If not, read no further.

Which brings us to the next part of the process:

You either need to have someone who really supports your career (who doesn’t mind seeing you once in a blue moon when you’re out on the road, who doesn’t mind that you don’t make much money, who doesn’t mind you coming home at 2:00 – 3:00 a.m., who doesn’t mind you making jokes about them or yourself, etc.), or you have to be alone until you make it big (hold your breath). That’s how most of the people who have made it have done it. They were married to their work. After they made it big, then they could afford to have a relationship. Can you hold off on relationships for a decade or so? If not, read no further.

Now I’m going to touch lightly on writing your material…and I say lightly because this can be a whole article all by itself…go back and read my post about How to Be Funny.

Until then, know this: The best material for you comes from you. When I first started doing stand-up comedy, I took a class from a very talented comedian who didn’t understand my kind of humor…so he had everybody else in the class write me some jokes. At the next open mike night, I attempted to tell the jokes that were written for me…can you say BOMB?!!! Actually, in the middle of the set, I looked at my instructor and told him that the stuff that he had written for me wasn’t working. The audience laughed. I went into some of my own material and the audience howled. Can you say KILLED?!! I knocked their socks off, but I used my stuff, the material that I was most comfortable with. I know that’s just the tip of the iceberg, but there will be more information to help take you to the next level in just a few days. Can you wait that long? If not, read no further.